Monday, October 12, 2015

Musings on the Inner Critic

One of the lessons I have done in my Integrative Transformative Art Training is

Life is Messy - It is Time to Befriend Your Inner Critic

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. 
 - Eleanor Roosevelt

My task was to paint my inner critic which they refer to as my inner dwarf.  I did 4 paintings in my sketch book, working on them mainly in my car.  All these paintings were intuitive.  I didn't plan anything I just let whatever came out come out.

The first verson of my inner critic looks a lot like my dad

The 2nd painting my inner critic was hanging around my neck like an incubus.  It made me feel like my throat chakra was in need of some healing.  
"An incubus is a demon in male form who, according to mythological and legendary traditions, lies upon sleepers, especially women, in order to engage in sexual activity with them. 

Its female counterpart is the succubus. Superstitious folk have for many centuries told salacious tales of incubi and succubi, and Genesis 6 is a passage used to support the credibility of such stories. These terms remain current among heavy metal bands and occult groups today. 

Some traditions hold that repeated sexual activity with an incubus or succubus may result in the deterioration of health, or even death." - wikipedia

The next painting the inner critic was whispering negative talk in my ear. The ears are still part of the throat chakra.  I am crying in the painting because I am so upset about what my inner critic is saying to me.
It was also winged but ended up looking like an adult ugly version of those winged head angels you see in italian paintings
The last version in was crawling up my head.  It was too skinny to be my father and sort of looks like my husband.  I felt like is was now on my crown chakra filling my head with negative ideas and self doubt.

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